Wednesday, November 4, 2026

A Donkey Can Still Kick An Ass



So here we are, the day after. And we're all breathing. For some of us it's a deep long breath of relaxation; for others, the short stuffy hyperventilation kind. 

But the main thing is that the midterm elections are finally over and for the most part we pretty know what the results are.

But wait.  There will certainly be excuses and misinformation from the man in the White House as to why our country went so overwhelmingly blue; and very little of it, if any at all, will involve his admitting any responsibility for the outcome. 

However, just to be on the safe side, and to alert you as to some of the things you may hear from the right over the next few days, I've drawn up a list 0f things (provided to me by one of the people who are part of Trump's inner circle -- Karoline Leavitt's nanny) and this is what you can expect to be...

TRUMP‘S TOP 10 REASONS WHY THE REPUBLICANS LOST THE MIDTERMS 

10) "Vladimir Putin promised me both diesel fuel and votes – what happened to the votes?"

9) "It’s the Haitians’ fault – they’re eating the cats! They’re eating the dogs! They’re eating the ballots!"

8) "I wouldn’t worry at this point -- we’re still waiting for the returns from Greenland"

7) "I thought we fixed our election fraud problems – after all, I’ve fixed more elections than any president in history"

6) "Maybe I shouldn’t have deported all those illegals who registered Republican"

5) "JD Vance should have stopped wearing eyeliner at his rallies -- he looked like a trans"

4) "Not enough Trump Bible purchasers came out to offset the Muslim vote" 

3) "It's all Katie Zacharias's fault"

2) "Next time, no one runs without me first examining their ass"

AND TRUMP'S NUMBER ONE REASON WHY THE REPUBLICANS LOST THE MIDTERMS:

"So I could save myself from having to mail out millions of $5000 checks" 


***************************************************

  
"Every weirdo in the world is on my wavelength."

  -- Thomas Pynchon