Once again it's that time of year when everyone seemingly loses their head (sometimes literally, depending on what costume they're wearing) and lets loose for a night of ghoulies, ghosties and orgies -- and experience the drive through hell on the way home when they can't focus on the road ahead and keep retching out the driver's door window.
But setting good times aside for the moment, you may discover that you've happened on a real clunker of a party at which death by beheading may seem to be a preferable alternative. However, before you wander into that party with your single Cyclops eye wide open, it might be helpful to be prepared in advance for such an occurrence in order to make a clean getaway across the bridge where the Headless Horseman can't trap you. And so with that in mind, I present...
TOP
10 SIGNS YOU'RE AT A BAD HALLOWEEN PARTY
10.)
“Bobbing for Apples” has been replaced by “Bombing for Kim Jung
Un”
9.)
Rosie O'Donnell shows up dressed as Steve Bannon; Steve Bannon shows
up dressed as Rosie O'Donnell – you can't tell who's who
8.)
The party turns out to be politically correct so everyone is required
to wish everyone else “Happy Hallow-days!”
7.)
Your invitation to Robert Mueller's party says “P.S. Please
be accompanied by legal representation”
6.) The three scariest things playing on the big screen are "Frankenstein," "Dracula," and a video of Kellyanne Conway in the outfit she wore to the inauguration
5.)
Eric and Donald Trump Jr. keep arguing over which end of the horse's
costume each of them is going to wear
4.)
At the zombie theme party, everyone comes dressed as a FEMA agent
3.)
Hoda and Kathie Lee are playing “Bobbing For Martini Olives”
2.)
Bill O'Reilly offers you $32 million to let him loofah you out of
your Wonder Woman costume
AND
THE NUMBER ONE SIGN YOU'RE AT A BAD HALLOWEEN PARTY...
It's
at Harvey Weinstein's house
*************************************************************
"Every weirdo in the world is on my wavelength."
-- Thomas Pynchon
No comments:
Post a Comment