I think most people will agree that this has been a trying year for our country, but as we near the end of 2016, this may be a good time to stop and be grateful for what we have and look forward to a better year in 2017.
Whoops, scratch that. This year, Thanksgiving is starting to look like it may be fraught with so much angst and stress, that on the one day when we should all come together, our nation will probably be engaged in one gigantic food fight..
But on the other hand, it could be worse. Some totally unexpected things could happen that would really screw up your holiday; and so, just to give you a forewarning of what to keep an eye out for, I've compiled...
TOP 10 SIGNS YOU'RE HAVING A BAD
THANKSGIVING
10) You're invited over to Bill and
Hillary's for Thanksgiving dinner and Hillary begins the blessing
with “I'm not sure how much we have to be thankful for this
year”...
9) Decide to start your holiday shopping at 6 pm on Thanksgiving night only to be met by people blocking the mall entrance and holding placards that say “BLACK FRIDAY LIVES
MATTER!”
8) Every time someone tries to
compliment you on your cooking, Kanye West interrupts to say that
Martha Stewart could have done a better job
7) Chris Christie shows up at your
front door dressed up like a pilgrim and asking if he could have some
food to take back to the President-Elect
6) Finished making your online
wagers on today's football games just as CNN announces that all the
sports sites have been hacked by the Russians
5) You invite Gary Johnson over for
Thanksgiving dinner and he replies “Thanksgiving? What's that?”
4) You're at Hoda and Kathie Lee's
Thanksgiving celebration and everybody's guessing on how long it
will be before one of them tips their wine over onto your lap
3) You turn on the TV to see that
Macy's parade has been ambushed by 10,000 protestors marching down
Broadway chanting ”Not my Santa Claus! Not my Santa Claus!”
2) Donald Trump's advice for enjoying your Thanksgiving meal: “Grab it by the giblets!”
AND THE NUMBER ONE SIGN YOU'RE HAVING A
BAD THANKSGIVING...
“As God is my witness, I thought
turkeys couldn't be elected president!”
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"Every weirdo in the world is on my wavelength."
-- Thomas Pynchon
