Friday, March 16, 2018

The Luck O' The Irish to Ya (And Save Some For Me)


I thought that since there's been so much bad news in the world lately that I might try turning the tables a little bit for St. Patrick's Day and see what I could come up with to feel good about; and what better way to do it than by trying to bring a little Irish luck to us all this year? so put away all those bad gloom and doom feelings about our world and our country, raise a glass of Jameson's and enjoy reading the...

TOP 10 SIGNS YOU'RE HAVING THE LUCK O' THE IRISH

10.) Your name is Stormy Daniels and you just found a pot of gold worth $130,000

9.) Kim Jung Un promises not to launch a nuclear strike against you until after St. Patrick's Day or you meet face to face, whichever comes first

8.) A Russian spy, insead of spraying you with a nerve agent, sprinkles you with a bowlful of Lucky Charms

7.) Trump just waived the tariff on anything colored green

6.) The space guy in the Tesla Roadster radios that he's reached Heaven and guess what? They have Guinness there too!

5.) You're on a tour of Ireland with your soulmate and you discover it's true love when she kisses you on the Dingle Peninsula, and you nuzzle her betwixt the Hills of Tipperary

4.) Warren Beatty and Faye Dunaway came back to your awards show, and this year they got it right

3.) That drag queen you just met who's dressed as a Cher impersonator turns out to really be Cher

2.) Sarah Huckabee Sanders starts adding the phrase “But he really just makes most things up” to all her responses

AND THE NUMBER ONE SIGN YOU'RE HAVING THE LUCK O' THE IRISH...

Donald Trump hasn't tweeted anything about you yet

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"Every weirdo in the world is on my wavelength."

-- Thomas Pynchon





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